dug dug Follow Aug 26, 2004 · 2 mins read


Well, it had to happen sooner or later, little girl vs bee (or wasp, I’ll never know). Have you noticed how this August, London has been overrun by wasps? A friend of mine has an alleyway down the side of his house where for the last three weeks, the floor has been literally carpeted by wasps. Apparently they eat the sap that drops on the pavement.

So Pamella (…all of our staff are first-aid trained… why do they need to lie and how do they do it so quickly and easily?) called just as I was heading out the door for lunch with Chris. She’s the nursery manager at Asquith, where CU-1 goes three days a week and a call from her is generally bad news.

CU-1 has been stung by a bee and we need you to take her to the doctor

Quick call to our doctor: surgery’s at four O’clock this afternoon, bring her around then which is nice, because Ruth, my mother, carries a syringe of adrenalin around in her purse so that when she gets stung by a wasp and stops breathing she can jab herself (I’m thinking Nicolas Cage in The Rock here…) and hope to survive the incident.

So now little CU-1’s heart is going to stop and I won’t be there to help (like I’m qualified–note to self: sort the **ing first-aid course TODAY). I’m running around the house trying to find the car keys, CU-1’s blankie to keep her warm so she doesn’t go into shock and looking for apple juice and biscuits and I call Pamela back from the mobile in a panic.

ring...ring...ring... pause... fax machine brrrruiiiiiiiii

So CU-1 is lying on the floor in the toddler room and everyone at Asquith is running around like the headless, under-paid, under-qualified chickens that they are and NOT ANSWERING THE DAMN PHONE so I rush out the door and try again on the mobile

Hello, Asquith Court Pamela speaking

So I scream at P that someone needs to stay with CU-1 every second that they need to be ready to rush her to A&E should there be any change in her breathing or swelling or…

So as we drive back from the Royal Free, with CU-1’s tummy full of yummy paracetamol we dose by weight–the amount may seem a little larger than what you give her at home (13.4 Kilos) and antihistamine elixir CU-1 keeps asking for more pine nuts and drinks her apple juice with satisfied little squirts.

She was born at the Royal Free, she drove me over there two weeks ago when I tore my little toe open and held my hand when I got stitches, she keeps going back and we’re getting to know the place quite well. I know it’s corny, but for an under-funded NHS facility, it’s brilliant. Everyone at A&E is friendly, patient, understanding and supportive and the separate pediatrics waiting room is brilliant. Seeing your daughter muck about in the ball-pool really takes the edge off a frightened parent’s nerves.

So, Doctor Davina and Nice Italian Nurse Man, thanks:-)

Written by dug Follow
Hiya, life goes like this. Step 1: Get out of bed. Step 2: Make things better:-)